For one week my electric bill lay on the counter, unopened.
Today was the day. I was going to face it, open it and trust I would have the $$ to make the payment which was now due on the 22nd.
My stomach in knots I opened the envelope, hoping for a miracle.
The amount due.......$150.00 (miracle delivered)
$150? is that all? What? $150 in this heat! WOW, only $150. I have $150. No big deal.
Just think if I had opened that a week ago I wouldn't have dreamed that the bill was $850 because my unit is sooooo old an inefficient, or regretted not putting insulation in, or not having the AC unit serviced in XX years or feeling stupid for signing up with Green Mountain, which locked me in at a rate higher then they are now quoting.
How my little monkey mind sure runs wild. The next time the bill comes I am going to open it the day it arrives and rejoice that I have any AC at all!!!
Have you opened yours?
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Guilt and overindulging
So a few of my friends have recently expressed guilt over their past indulgences in sweets, comfort foods, booze or sexual activities (okay the first one was mine). Remember this: it matters less about what you are indulging in or why and matters more about how we feel afterward. What pulls us into a pit of despair is our guilt about how we feel about what we have done...not the cake at the bottom of our belly or the empty wine bottles.
I'm not saying to not work on why we are over-enjoying (I'll get to that in another blog), but first let's talk more about guilt.
Guilt vs Shame
Let me make something clear: guilt is about "what you did"; shame is about "who you are."
Also, there is healthy guilt and unhealthy guilt as well as healthy shame and unhealthy shame.
And guilt can lead to shame. In John Bradshaw's book, "The Shame That Binds," he states, "Healthy shame is an emotion which signals us about our limits. Like all emotions healthy shame is an energy-in-motion. Like all emotions it moves us to get our basic needs met."
I believe the same could be said about guilt.
Healthy guilt causes us to consider not doing something again, or at least that is how it is supposed to work. But it is a cycle we experience over and over. It seems we never remember that feeling and we are off again in the "land of overindulgence." But, what if when we are feeling guilty, we could just forgive ourselves...just give ourselves permission to enjoy "a little something" from time to time, to partake in the pleasure (as long as they are not coming from a position of harm) without the guilt. I bet you would find that if you usually eat a chocolate bar and your face breaks out, it is the guilt that is causes the break out, not the chocolate. Next time you have a desire for something sweet, enjoy it in moderation and with awareness.
Have you heard of those frozen guilt-free deserts, that manufacturer/marketer was on to something.....now, where are my M&Ms?
I'm not saying to not work on why we are over-enjoying (I'll get to that in another blog), but first let's talk more about guilt.
Guilt vs Shame
Let me make something clear: guilt is about "what you did"; shame is about "who you are."
Also, there is healthy guilt and unhealthy guilt as well as healthy shame and unhealthy shame.
And guilt can lead to shame. In John Bradshaw's book, "The Shame That Binds," he states, "Healthy shame is an emotion which signals us about our limits. Like all emotions healthy shame is an energy-in-motion. Like all emotions it moves us to get our basic needs met."
I believe the same could be said about guilt.
Healthy guilt causes us to consider not doing something again, or at least that is how it is supposed to work. But it is a cycle we experience over and over. It seems we never remember that feeling and we are off again in the "land of overindulgence." But, what if when we are feeling guilty, we could just forgive ourselves...just give ourselves permission to enjoy "a little something" from time to time, to partake in the pleasure (as long as they are not coming from a position of harm) without the guilt. I bet you would find that if you usually eat a chocolate bar and your face breaks out, it is the guilt that is causes the break out, not the chocolate. Next time you have a desire for something sweet, enjoy it in moderation and with awareness.
Have you heard of those frozen guilt-free deserts, that manufacturer/marketer was on to something.....now, where are my M&Ms?
Friday, June 26, 2009
Michael Jackson Died Of A Broken Heart.
Michael Jackson is brilliant. I admire him and his creative process. Unfortunately Michael was also a star and everything he ever did was brought out in public to be judged. He was also troubled and could never get ahead of it. I heard a few people say that now he is gone the children are safer...do you really think so? Let's remember him for his talent and the good he did for so many and for all the songs that still play on in our heads.
Perhaps Michael died of a broken heart, perhaps all he wanted to do was make music to make others happy. To free his spirit now, consider releasing him from our judgment of him, let's forgive him for anything he did consciously or unconsciously to hurt or offend and in doing so we can forgive ourselves for anything we've done to hurt him or others.
Forgiveness has tremendous power, even in death. His heart cried out: Let's free Michael to sing from his heart without judgment. Let him know he made a difference. Peace to you dear brother.
Perhaps Michael died of a broken heart, perhaps all he wanted to do was make music to make others happy. To free his spirit now, consider releasing him from our judgment of him, let's forgive him for anything he did consciously or unconsciously to hurt or offend and in doing so we can forgive ourselves for anything we've done to hurt him or others.
Forgiveness has tremendous power, even in death. His heart cried out: Let's free Michael to sing from his heart without judgment. Let him know he made a difference. Peace to you dear brother.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Awakening Your Senses in Belize
Caving in Belize.
Each day of the tour our guests will experience one of the five senses in an extraordinary way. On Friday, when we tour the cave, we will explore the sense of touch. And bring awareness to mind of how the rocks feel, how the ground feels under our bare feet, how the dampness or coolness of the cave feels...expanding that into an emotional feeling and feeling of appreciation for our bodies, ourselves and others.
Travel with us to Belize October 22-27 and experience the sense of touch in a completely new way that will lead you to discover a new part of yourself.
$1999 (includes airfare, accommodations, ground transportation, tour fees and most meals), $2199 after 6/30/09, so send you $100 deposit today. Contact Dawn Heyl at dawnheylskincare@tx.rr.com
Submitted by c0-host for the tour, Valerie Grimes. 
I am ecstatic about being a “tour buddy” for a group who wants to expand their experiences with the Maya peoples of Central America, as Belize is such a diverse country. We will visit the famed ruins and travel back to ancient times exploring breath-taking caves, and we will spend a day with local medicine woman, Dr. Rosita Arvigo, to learn about the healing plants of the rain forest and to experience a Maya ritual bath which is an integral and revered part of indigenous Maya medical practices and village life. Adults and children are regularly bathed in water infused with sacred plants and prayers to ensure their emotional, spiritual, and physical well-being, and you can experience this with us first hand! This trip will be five unforgettable days of realizing and becoming all that you are with your five senses being tantalized to the max!
Don’t miss this life changing experience.
Dawn Heyl
Your Trip Host
October 22-27, 2009, departs from DFW Airport.
For more info: dawnheylskincare@tx.rr.com
Each day of the tour our guests will experience one of the five senses in an extraordinary way. On Friday, when we tour the cave, we will explore the sense of touch. And bring awareness to mind of how the rocks feel, how the ground feels under our bare feet, how the dampness or coolness of the cave feels...expanding that into an emotional feeling and feeling of appreciation for our bodies, ourselves and others.
Travel with us to Belize October 22-27 and experience the sense of touch in a completely new way that will lead you to discover a new part of yourself.
$1999 (includes airfare, accommodations, ground transportation, tour fees and most meals), $2199 after 6/30/09, so send you $100 deposit today. Contact Dawn Heyl at dawnheylskincare@tx.rr.com
Submitted by c0-host for the tour, Valerie Grimes.
Date Set for Discover Belize. Rediscover Yourself Trip.
I am ecstatic about being a “tour buddy” for a group who wants to expand their experiences with the Maya peoples of Central America, as Belize is such a diverse country. We will visit the famed ruins and travel back to ancient times exploring breath-taking caves, and we will spend a day with local medicine woman, Dr. Rosita Arvigo, to learn about the healing plants of the rain forest and to experience a Maya ritual bath which is an integral and revered part of indigenous Maya medical practices and village life. Adults and children are regularly bathed in water infused with sacred plants and prayers to ensure their emotional, spiritual, and physical well-being, and you can experience this with us first hand! This trip will be five unforgettable days of realizing and becoming all that you are with your five senses being tantalized to the max!Don’t miss this life changing experience.
Dawn Heyl
Your Trip Host
October 22-27, 2009, departs from DFW Airport.
For more info: dawnheylskincare@tx.rr.com
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Instructions for Life
Today I was cleaning my house and the following information on how to best take advantage of our human experience came to me. Perhaps you can consider applying them to your own life.
They are amazingly simple, yet extremely complex:
I'll end today with this quote, from a 17th century poet:
They are amazingly simple, yet extremely complex:
- Forgive Others/Self
- Forget
- Love
- Peace
- Heaven
I'll end today with this quote, from a 17th century poet:
George Herbert
He that cannot forgive others, breaks the bridge over which
he himself must pass if he would ever reach heaven;
for everyone has need to be forgiven.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Let’s Just Skip the Part About Forgiveness And Get On To Part Where My Life Changes.
5/26/09
Valerie A. Grimes
Let’s Just Skip the Part About Forgiveness
And Get On To Part Where My Life Changes.
When clients visit me for a hypnosis session, it is usually after they have tried many other methods to relieve their emotional pain and are now ready to work on their failed relationship, addiction, feelings of anxiety or low self-esteem. Our process consists of four distinct phases required to bring about change that must be conducted in this order:
1) Discovery of Cause (Why Do I Feel Anxious? etc)
2) Emotional Release (Giving Voice to Inner Child)
3) Forgiveness (of Self or Others)
4) Re-learning (Placement of new belief system and process for strengthening)
However, where I see progress bogging down is with the third step -- the process of forgiveness to ourselves and/or others. Most clients want to skip the part about forgiveness and just get to the part where their life changes and they can be happy. Not going to happen.
We hear a lot about the benefits of forgiveness through DVDs, CDs, podcasts and books on the subject. But don’t those resentment gurus know how hard it is? Yes, but they also know it is possible, or they wouldn’t suggest it. Holding resentments affect the body’s ability to thrive. And, if one desires to improve one’s chances of being healthy, then releasing this resentment can free the body from stress and give them a sense of accomplishment, as feelings centered around an old experience begin to change. By letting the energy that was tied up in the resentment be redirected toward constructive decisions, one get closer to the kind of life one wants to live. And that is a lovely thing.
Effects of not forgiving
If you are experiencing regret, sadness, hurt, fear, guilt, blame, anger, resentment and sometimes even revenge, it is an indication of the need for forgiveness. If left alone, these feelings cause chemical reactions creating depression, physical ailments, chronic pain and suppression of the immune system. (For more on this, read: “Molecules of Emotion,” by Candace Pert). I have witnessed clients in various stages of cancer, all with the same common negative emotion – resentment. “The Course In Miracles” states, “All disease comes from a state of un-forgiveness.” Our lives just can’t flow freely when we hold onto resentment.
However, through forgiveness therapy, memories become powerless and no longer generate feelings of anger, rate, frustration, depression and resentment.
Making true peace possible.
I can’t confront the person.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean the person has to confront the perpetrator; forgiveness exists in the heart of the forgiver.
Emmit Fox created a visualization which places the person you want to forgive on stage, receiving praise from the audience, seeing them happy and full of confidence and sureness -- I’ve used this one before and I am amazed at how the client can get to this point especially considering some of the acts of the perpetrator. But to see one visualizing this person receiving love and praise is almost as if one can feel the room get warmer as the heart melts and opens into a state of true forgiveness. Keep in mind this is a process and it not usually achieved in one or two sessions. (Darn, there is really no magic hypnotic wand). The client only gets to this point after they have released anger and frustration and feel safe enough to do so.
Is the Law of Attraction Working For You?
Positive Self Talk and Affirmations won’t work unless accompanied by emotions that match the beliefs that are already in the subconscious. Orison S. Marden, the father of the success movement, states, “Our destiny changes with our thought; we shall become what we wish to become, do what we wish to do, when our habitual thought corresponds with our desire.” Hypnosis is a rapid method for matching thoughts to desires and desires to thoughts, so the Law of Attraction can work in a positive way.
Hypnotherapy facilitates true healing by releasing buried emotions and gives the client freedom to experience the person they truly are. One doesn’t need to know how, just willing and pick up the phone and call me.
www.valeriegrimes.com
Valerie A. Grimes
Let’s Just Skip the Part About Forgiveness
And Get On To Part Where My Life Changes.
When clients visit me for a hypnosis session, it is usually after they have tried many other methods to relieve their emotional pain and are now ready to work on their failed relationship, addiction, feelings of anxiety or low self-esteem. Our process consists of four distinct phases required to bring about change that must be conducted in this order:
1) Discovery of Cause (Why Do I Feel Anxious? etc)
2) Emotional Release (Giving Voice to Inner Child)
3) Forgiveness (of Self or Others)
4) Re-learning (Placement of new belief system and process for strengthening)
However, where I see progress bogging down is with the third step -- the process of forgiveness to ourselves and/or others. Most clients want to skip the part about forgiveness and just get to the part where their life changes and they can be happy. Not going to happen.
We hear a lot about the benefits of forgiveness through DVDs, CDs, podcasts and books on the subject. But don’t those resentment gurus know how hard it is? Yes, but they also know it is possible, or they wouldn’t suggest it. Holding resentments affect the body’s ability to thrive. And, if one desires to improve one’s chances of being healthy, then releasing this resentment can free the body from stress and give them a sense of accomplishment, as feelings centered around an old experience begin to change. By letting the energy that was tied up in the resentment be redirected toward constructive decisions, one get closer to the kind of life one wants to live. And that is a lovely thing.
Effects of not forgiving
If you are experiencing regret, sadness, hurt, fear, guilt, blame, anger, resentment and sometimes even revenge, it is an indication of the need for forgiveness. If left alone, these feelings cause chemical reactions creating depression, physical ailments, chronic pain and suppression of the immune system. (For more on this, read: “Molecules of Emotion,” by Candace Pert). I have witnessed clients in various stages of cancer, all with the same common negative emotion – resentment. “The Course In Miracles” states, “All disease comes from a state of un-forgiveness.” Our lives just can’t flow freely when we hold onto resentment.
However, through forgiveness therapy, memories become powerless and no longer generate feelings of anger, rate, frustration, depression and resentment.
Making true peace possible.
I can’t confront the person.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean the person has to confront the perpetrator; forgiveness exists in the heart of the forgiver.
Emmit Fox created a visualization which places the person you want to forgive on stage, receiving praise from the audience, seeing them happy and full of confidence and sureness -- I’ve used this one before and I am amazed at how the client can get to this point especially considering some of the acts of the perpetrator. But to see one visualizing this person receiving love and praise is almost as if one can feel the room get warmer as the heart melts and opens into a state of true forgiveness. Keep in mind this is a process and it not usually achieved in one or two sessions. (Darn, there is really no magic hypnotic wand). The client only gets to this point after they have released anger and frustration and feel safe enough to do so.
Is the Law of Attraction Working For You?
Positive Self Talk and Affirmations won’t work unless accompanied by emotions that match the beliefs that are already in the subconscious. Orison S. Marden, the father of the success movement, states, “Our destiny changes with our thought; we shall become what we wish to become, do what we wish to do, when our habitual thought corresponds with our desire.” Hypnosis is a rapid method for matching thoughts to desires and desires to thoughts, so the Law of Attraction can work in a positive way.
Hypnotherapy facilitates true healing by releasing buried emotions and gives the client freedom to experience the person they truly are. One doesn’t need to know how, just willing and pick up the phone and call me.
www.valeriegrimes.com
Saturday, May 23, 2009
The Lover's Shopping List
When you go to the store,
please don’t forget to pick up
some things for the one you love.
Intimacy is high on my list,
but it is also high on the shelf
and on one of those less frequented
isles with the canning
goods and boxes of barley.
You have to work to find it.
Forgiveness is a staple you
can’t do without. But is has
to be the pure stuff, the most
sincere form of forgiveness
the store has to offer.
Lightheartedness is always
good to have on hand, it
helps ease those tense moments
and turn them into laughter.
Better get a dozen of these.
Goodness and Love are a
combination that are marketed
in several ways, but the most
heartfelt kind begins with
our Creator who is goodness
and love, so you have to buy
this a special store.
(I hope you don’t mind making the
extra stop)
valerie grimes
9/20/98
please don’t forget to pick up
some things for the one you love.
Intimacy is high on my list,
but it is also high on the shelf
and on one of those less frequented
isles with the canning
goods and boxes of barley.
You have to work to find it.
Forgiveness is a staple you
can’t do without. But is has
to be the pure stuff, the most
sincere form of forgiveness
the store has to offer.
Lightheartedness is always
good to have on hand, it
helps ease those tense moments
and turn them into laughter.
Better get a dozen of these.
Goodness and Love are a
combination that are marketed
in several ways, but the most
heartfelt kind begins with
our Creator who is goodness
and love, so you have to buy
this a special store.
(I hope you don’t mind making the
extra stop)
valerie grimes
9/20/98
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